Thursday, 16 October 2014

When breakups become more cruel

Twenty-something women (closer to 30 than 20): when I look at the girls of my generation, I see that a lot of them are married/getting children, when it looks like the majority of them is in a serious relationship. Others are either single or maybe they just ended a relationship. A relationship they thought it was the one. So, why do the breakups get more cruel?

Talking with a friend my age about our peers settling down (having children), we agreed that we are under no pressure because of that (in fact we still feel quite young), but I believe at this age we somehow start wanting things (=relationships) that lead somewhere. What I can't really say for men this age. It can happen that a woman thinks they are doing fine, while he likes her and enjoys being with her. But if their relationship ended out of nowhere, he'll be just fine with it, while she will feel it's a great loss for her. And that he'll just find/meet someone in the future, while she believes she was lucky to meet him and who knows if she will have that luck again someday. So, when women our age meet a person, who represents a package that fits us in all aspects, it's likely we won't feel need to meet/ be with other people anymore.  

I read somewhere (or maybe did I hear it) that (though every death is hard and sad) it's even somehow harder for the relatives when someone dies suddenly, in a moment (for example in a car accident) than when someone is dying for a longer time. Because in the second case  relatives have time to prepare themselves and the chance to say goodbye, while in first case this is not possible. I don't know about death, but I think something like this happens in relationships. That probably the most painful way of ending some story is, when you thought the relationship worked really good and had a future, but it ended in a moment, out of nowhere. A story in which there was no arguing, no cheating, where nobody felt estranged from another. So, the one person, with whom you could practically stay forever, in a minute becomes a part of your past.

And what about the famous bad timing thing? Well, I'm convinced it doesn't exist, At least not when two people who like each other are together. Because if you want to be with someone, you make an effort no matter what. And where there's a will, there's a way.

Charles Bukowski once said:"You have to die a few times before you can really live." But women in twenty-something (around 30) got to this point of our life during years. Years in which we gained lessons, knowledge, experience. So there comes a time when we are able to settle down if (in our opinion) the one comes around. So guys, keep that in mind when dating a girl from this group. Especially if she's a keeper! (: