Her heart was a secret garden and the walls were very high

I found this quote by pure chance on the web and liked it immediately. I kind of recognised myself in it and thought it would be cool to have a photo, related to it. Next day I was spending the afternoon with a girl from France in Ljubljana and of course we were taking pictures. Later at home I have noticed that, though unintentionally,we made that photo (:

The picture

That week I also started reading The top five regrets of the dying (an amazing book, by the way) in which the author also wrote about the walls people build around them. That it is a way of protecting yourself from being hurt, but on a long-term you cause the most damage actually to yourself. One of the top regrets people had before dying was: "I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings." These stories were really very sad. One man told her, that his son just knows he loves him. She asked him: "Did you tell him that?" He replied, that he didn't, but that he just knows it. The truth was that his son believed he has to prove himself for his father to love him, so he didn't know it. At that point I thought about the Chapman's 5 Love languages and how we express our love in different ways. Words of affirmation are just one way.

A decoration

Omnia vincit amor. A quote a man at the Ljubljana Castle (also that week) wrote me and I pasted it in my room. Translation: Love conquers all. Sounds like a cliche at first glance, I know. But looking at it for a while, it crossed my mind that there is actually so much love around us, we just have to see it. Mother, preparing you all the possible things when you are ill. The cousins you can rely on. Your dog seeking for love. A neighbour's cat coming to cuddle with you.

With my youngest cousin last weekend

Like Nena sings: "Liebe ist." 
Love. Liebe. Ljubezen. Ljubav.

An adorable cat, that was following us. So we made a photoshooting with her :D

Cleaning out my wardrobe

Abraham Lincoln once said: "When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. And that's my religion." Words to internalise, in my opinion.

Last weekend I found my mother in the attic of my parents' house and asked: "Mum, what are you doing?" "I'm gathering the clothes, which we are going to send to people in flooded places in Bosnia." My mother-such a modest and generous woman. A few minutes later I was automatically cleaning out my wardrobe. For the same purpose.

Since it has been a while that I did that, I found a lot of things I don't wear anymore or I forgot I have. Blue jeans, skirts, shirts,.. It's hard to imagine that one person wore them all, due to their different styles, but I'm sure that each of the pieces will find a new owner. Of the clothes I haven't worn for a long time, I kept just those with a story behind. A pullover my deceased grandmother bought me, although it's too big, but maybe one day it will fit me. 

When I finished, I remembered what my cousin, a dentist (with whom I lived in my first year at the faculty), used to say. She was a real enthusiast and we had strict rules about cleaning. When one of us (3 girls living together) finished with cleaning, she asked: "Don't you guys feel so much better now, when everything is so clean?" Oh yes, we surely did (:

I finished in about half an hour and emptied approximately the half of my wardrobe.

But the most important fact: I felt good.

A sports addict

I never did any sports. Even our high school workout wasn't interesting to me. Besides that I had luck to be skinny, so I didn't "need" to work out for that reason. The only sport I did was inline skating which, after 18 years, I still adore. Now I'm almost a sports addict. I like hiking, but my biggest passion is cycling.

Making a picture for a friend

My cycling story started 5 years ago, when my colleague from faculty invited me to go cycling with her. At start, our average tour lasted 60 kilometres and it was probably the best possible way of hanging out:  conversations with women topics, being in nature, burning calories :D But the best part about it was the energy you had for the rest of the day. At my 25 I was more fit than ever before.

A 180 km tour

I remember that before we went on a 180 km tour, some friends asked whether we are going to sleep over somewhere during it. I said: "Yes, we are going to sleep over in Celje and go back home the next day." "Oh, I thought you guys are going to sleep over somewhere already on your way there!" But 90 kilometres really is nothing when you are in a good shape:D Ok, it depends on how hilly the landscape is. To me, the toughest tour was from Novo mesto to the Kolpa river (about 105 kilometres). We cycled there in the morning, were swimming during the day and cycled back home in the evening. The tour was quite hilly, besides that 2 angry dogs were chasing us. What a fun! :D 

Friends (even my mother) thought that is me in the picture (:

Speaking of dogs, I like this quote: "Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of the car window." Cycling really is about experiencing the world around you on a completely different level. Like I read somewhere: driving in a car is like watching pictures, while cycling is seeing things live. According to the research, people who regularly do sport activity look younger, are more satisfied with their life and live longer!

Cycling on a sunny day, May 2014

"Sport keeps young." I just wish I would have started sooner!

The story of us

People in Germany (usually friends of my friends) often asked me where did I learn German. I told them that I learned it for 4 years in high school, because it was my second foreign language. Then they usually said, that I speak their language very well. I always replied: "We had a tough and demanding professor."

My hometown. The Grammar School is on the right side

Our Grammar School (Gimnazija Novo mesto) has always had a high reputation for having tough professors. And the toughest of them all were our English and German professor. Everybody knew that and most of us were afraid of them. They were so called old school professors with an amazing authority. Our English professor was also my neighbour, but she didn't know that and I never mentioned it. Actually, she never really memorised my name :D Our grades at these two subjects were on average 2 grades lower than our grades in general and we were often complaining that they demand a college knowledge. The last year we got a new professor for German and our grades increased.

I. Samobor, Class Enemy

"Today I would like to speak in Slovenian. I don't want either you or me to miss anything. Tell me, what did I do wrong? Tell me honestly. You have nothing more to fear." This is a quote that really moved me. It is from the movie Class Enemy which is based on a true story that happened at our school (also the film was shot there). The director of the movie and my cousin were freshmen, I was still attending Primary School when a student comitted suicide. Watching this movie was like watching our years there but with different eyes. Though the director said he got an idea for a german professor (by the way, I. Samobor's play was outstanding)  at his math professor, I could relate it to our german professor.

I have been thinking about this movie for a long time after I left cinema. A movie that stays with you. It's not just the story of this generation and it's even not just the story of our school. It's the story of all of us. And it's definitely one of the best slovenian movies!

The ticket (:

A midnight conversation

I like to talk. I mean, I like to participate in cool conversations. The ones that make you think. And I also like to discuss things with men to see their point of view. Recently I read somewhere that you should listen 70 % and talk only 30 % of the time.

We met for a coffee at 8 p.m. At the beginning there were also his friends but somewhere around midnight we left and went to some other bar. He comes from Germany but lives in Austria. A sports enthusiast who prefers a relaxed lifestyle. I actually didn't recognize him-I had some perception in my head but he looks better in person than he does on the photos :D

We basically talked about everything. I even mentioned my last emotional experience, which is still somewhere in the background of my mind. My friends told me once or twice that I should not be that honest in conversations with men. But if I'm in the right mood I'm going to talk about it.

He said he thinks nowadays in general people don't make much effort when it comes to the man-woman relations. "But opportunities are rare. And because of that you should make an effort when you meet someone special," I replied.

It was obvious that we were both pretty sleepy, but despite that we continued our conversation. We said goodbye at 6 a.m.

It was an interesting experience. Maybe I will visit him this summer in Austria and go to a mountain cycling with him. That should be fun! (:

Is it hard to find a boyfriend (in Ljubljana)?

My new friend, a girl from Austria, asked me that. "Hmm.. Yes. But that's because I'm choosy." "That's good. It means you have standards." If I look back, I've met potential boyfriends on average every 1,5 years.

Our psychology professor at the faculty said that statistically speaking, the most stable relationships are those which develop from friendships. It's somehow logical to agree with that, because you know that people much better than you know those you meet in a club and who you soon start dating. But there's a catch: it has been said that while men only have one ladder-The real ladder, women have two ladders-also the friends ladder. A ladder is a rating system which everybody has and on which people of the opposite sex are positioned. The friends ladder consists of guys that we are not interested in and what is more important: in general, there is no jumping from the friends ladder to the real ladder.

I was discussing this Ladder Theory with my friend, a guy, and said: "Wait, what if out of nowhere I start feeling attracted to some guy that I have known for a long time and have never been interested in him before? That means that he "jumped" from my friends ladder to the real ladder?" "No, he didn't. He was on your real ladder the whole time, it's just that he was very low positioned." I have to say, that sounded interesting.

My girlfriend and I have always used to say that it's better to be quality alone, than in a low-quality relationship. There's a quote that I recall: "The smarter the woman is, the more difficult it is for her to find the right man." Lauren Bacall, an american actress and model, said that women always fall in love with the same type of a man. That this is our way of monogamy.

The thing is, that I've been fascinated by a man in the past. You know.."that something". When you could actually forget all the other guys and stay with him. So, what's the point of wanting something less than that?

Life is better when you have cool neighbours

I moved in in 2006, right after the building has been built and the flats have been sold. The flats were ment for students and young people who want to live on their own, so most of them are studio apartments. My friend once said: "Wow, you live in that building? It looks like a building at the seaside!" "Seaside? Why?" "Because it looks totally cool." I laughed :D

Actually, the first 6 years I didn't know a soul there, although it was obvious that the population really was mostly students and young people. Maybe I studied too much and was asocial because of that :D But it's interesting that also my neighbour who lives 2 doors away moved in in 2006, but we first met and became friends in spring last year. About 2 weeks later we met another neighbour and now people from 5 flats out of 9 in our hallway are friends. Now we have a tea party, go for a walk and every now and then someone throws a party. But the police is a rare visitor at the door. I was once joking that neighbours don't call the police because they are all at the party :D 

I remember that a guy from Sweden, who was my neighbour's couchsurfer and we were hanging out together at her place, said he was surprised how people in Slovenia, especially neighbours, hang out together. In his country they don't know their neighbours and don't even say "hi" when they meet. Well, it's known that the Slovenes in general are a pretty open nation :D

To conclude, our building is definitely not an ordinary building in Ljubljana. Its feature are the relations between us. And life is better when you have cool neighbours. (:

The neighbours (: